*re-reads sex chapter of fanfiction over breakfast cereal like it’s the morning paper*
*waits to see how they will avoid love interests in the music video* *sips wine cos they already went and used their fam in soml video so they can’t even be cheesy and put their mums and sisters in it* *lights cigarette and hopes ben winston is not directing it*
what the hell is wrong with harry he eats gluten free and cut red meat out of his diet he binges fresh fruit and soul cycle and consumes his body weight in water on stage yet he’s still always sick. is he ok? is he not getting enough sleep? is the environment of earth taking its toll on his alien body?
Word count: ~4 700
Summary: “We could make a deal,” he says softly, twirling a small curl around his finger before letting it go to trace invisible patterns on Harry’s skin again. “Like, if neither of us are married by your thirtieth birthday we marry each other.”